I was writing to a friend to try and explain to them where I was at in my life ... and more important to myself as well.
My Relationship with G-d
Dear Friend,
Today I have decided to share with you what my relationship with G-d is as I continue on my life journey … a simple statement says it best … “to do G-d's work” ... not for me or anyone else … but for G-d.
That is what my life is all about … what my purpose is … what I strive to accomplish. That also means that I must take care of myself and those around me in more than just tangible ways ... as it is also so important to provide them with Love and Understanding.
This is who I have become … as this I believe is G-d's way too. So I nourish my soul by doing mitzvahs (blessings) as often as I can ... not because they are there to do ... no ... because my heart calls out to me to do them ... and ask nothing in return … except with a hope that they may make even the smallest difference to someone.
While married I practiced Conservative Judaism ... actually re-discovered my Jewish roots in 1997 while in the Netherlands on business and had a pseudo-religious experience. Shortly after I returned to the states I began to regularly study Torah and Jewish history. I am not very good in Hebrew but my Love of G-d is as strong as anyone's I know … as G-d is with me every day.
Today, I vary on going to Reform, Conservative or Chabad services on Shabbat. Each of these established forms of Judaism provide me with a very different perspective on the meaning of what being a Jew is and gives me a greater appreciation of my Jewish heritage.
The practice of observing Shabbat has evolved into a special meaning to me … as it becomes even more so every week that I choose to celebrate G-d’s gift to me of Life, with appreciation for all I have been given.
There is much discussion that can go on forever on this subject … and has already by so many … for thousands of years … but I will wait for the right time and place to do so.
My appreciation for Jewish Mysticism and the writings in Zohar also continues to grow. The world is meant to be only as mysterious as one wants it to be. It is written, “As it is concealed so it is revealed” … “As it is above … so it is below. And as it is below … so it is above.” … and so it is.
For sure I am an evolving Jew … a man who desires an understanding of “what is” with acceptance … and acceptance of “what is” with understanding … this is by choice.
An evolving Jew who chooses to explore the world from many perspectives that most may never have the opportunity to or choose to see during their current life. It is inside my heart and soul to continue my journey … not searching for the sake of searching… but discovering and creating for the sake of G-d’s Commandments … content and at peace … because G-d is with me … always.
I better stop here for perhaps what I am saying you may not like to hear. If that is so … I understand. But perhaps what I have said has opened up your curiosity to hear more. I am thankful that G-d has given us choice.
Blessing to you,
By Ronnie K - Tucson - Age 60 - January 20, 2007
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